Sunday, October 17, 2010

~~~...Entropy...~~~

It has been a while since we have been our old selves, when we talk, and I feel like I have forgotten who you used to be.  You most certainly think that I have changed.  Funny thing is, everybody else has noticed the changes in us but they never notice the change in the way we see each other.  I think about it sometimes.  I don't blame them.  How can they know?  They have not been a part of what we had built all on our own.  A world that was sheltered from all prying eyes and eavesdropping ears.  There was no need of anyone other than us in this world. We never felt lonely.
Lately though all that has changed a little.  You no longer need me.  
There used to be an urgency in the way you would tell me about your day, about how you felt, and about what you thought about the things that I had to say.  There used to be a twinkle in your eyes when they would see me, and an interesting sort of excitement would be apparent on your face.  You wanted me to tell you things.  Things about the world, things about life, and these things made you think.  You thought about them and you told me what you thought of them.  
I miss that time.
Now it is a mess of awkwardness at times.  There is no twinkle, at least none associated to me.  I am a figure, I am a statue, I am an object that is always present and never intriguing.  There is no urgency at all, none.  There is nothing left to tell, nothing left to share.  Oh of course there is stuff that happens everyday, life is a moving force, so a lot of new memories are formed everyday.  It is just that sharing them with me is not the first, or the second, or even the third thing on your mind anymore.  The only problem is that I have not yet come to terms with this.
I miss the old you.  I hate the new me.  There is no middle ground.  We lost what we had and it has been processed in the garbage disposal of time.  The ground beneath our feet, or say our bond, has crumbled.  You were quick in finding a new place and I was slow.
I am trying to move through air and find solid ground.  I do not like the feeling of falling through space.
I will reach somewhere new.  Or I will find you and share your earth again.

Fin.

15 comments:

  1. "I am a figure, I am a statue, I am an object that is always present and never intriguing."

    This is a beautiful line. You're as good at prose, as you're at poetry.

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  2. Wowww...lovely!! truly a good post. Keep writing!!

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  3. being someone who has loved and lost, i wish id read this earlier or well ud written this sooner.. :) would've helped put things into perspective for me..maybe the complacency would'nt have set in and i would'nt have lost someone i loved...whose memory i still cherish..
    ah well..i believe our flaws and mistakes tend to build character and depth, if of course we are willing to understand and deal with them..just hope that happens over here if infact its inspired by real life-but something so deep really could'nt come about otherwise could it?? :)
    wonderfully penned and expressed..i wish you'd do more stuff like this..

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  4. One's touch at Prose can be judged on how well they drag others into thoughts and memories. Yours did it, you were wonderful at it. And the lines you used, just beautiful.

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  5. Sometimes we wish nothing would change, and then time changes and so do we... The new me and the new you was always a part of our being, just that time sheds light on different facets of our lives at different times...

    @hiyer

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  6. Don't tell me this is your first attempt at prose. I won't believe you! This is awesome!
    If its from personal experience, its really well-written. It captures the feelings like I've never seen before.
    If not from personal experience. How? Just how do you know how it feels, so well?!

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  7. Viti
    The end is truly brilliant
    and agree with nidhign
    "I am a figure, I am a statue, I am an object that is always present and never intriguing."
    those lines demand your attention
    hold you and enslave you to that moment
    the reader and the writer
    become one

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  8. Truly moving post.. deep feelings ..
    It's hard to bear the pain of lost love but as Tennyson said -- "It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all."
    Keep writing more :)

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  9. As someone else also commented. You're as good at prose as you're at poetry.

    I have been a silent admirer of your work, but this one connected on a subliminal level, Made me put this comment here.

    the Baavri Viti is not so Baavri anymore. nuff said. :)

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  10. I hated the preciseness at times. But whatever, it was awesome. So true, so involving. Not all mine, not yet, but I could see the truth inside. I could almost feel. And believe me, it's a classic. Now that I have written this, probably I'll bookmark it. It's worth it. even though it's so common, so everyday, so every time.

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  11. Thank you so much everyone! I am amazed at the response. I also loved all the different perspectives you all brought in with your comments. As for this being from my experience...well this is me, yes. But this 'me' is shaped by everyone who has been a part of my life. It is the collective thoughts and memories shared here.
    Thank you again!

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  12. this is brilliant. the best. u must right more of prose in combination with your poetry. promise me you will :)

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  13. @adee: thanks a lot! i did write more prose :D did you read about the crazy dream?

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